Have a drink.
Jay Vegas   Dancing AL   Joneses   Guestbook   Turkey  20 January 2001 
Search for on
You wanna bet a thousand?
mystery car

Who the hell is this?

What family first lived in Valentic's house on Giannell Avenue?
Web Links
Ashtabula Property Lookup

Saturday Night Live Real Media

Ashtabula NUDE!

Caddyshack Homepage

Ashtabula Hairstyles

Ohio Criminal Lookup

Savarise Music

Soundclips AL|Anna|Anna2
Get the scoop.
New Scoop

Reunited and it Feels So Good
After 10 years sans Skane, three old pals get drunk during their high school reunion at the K of P hall last Friday.

Under Italia
Martini Ancora in Vacanza
Dopo due anni di divertimento, Martino, il proprietario di Down Under, ha deciso di tornare in Italia questo fine settimana. La polizia italiana in collaborazione con i caschi blu
dell'ONU rassicura che tutto andrà per il meglio. Pare che anche lo scrittore in erba Mark Pucci abbia deciso di calcare le scene europee provando la comodità dei divani italiani per un periodo di circa quattro mesi. Il duo presenzierà come ospite d'onore al Maurizio Costanzo Show nonchè a Buona Domenica. In bocca al lupo!

Torch Passed On
Martinis Under New Management
As of this week the Martinis website will be taking on the team of Mark Pucci and the Dougster as acting editors-in-chief. Martini says the reason for the sudden shift in administration is a six-month safari that will take him to the farthest reaches of the Dry Creek, including Crap Creek, Peace Valley, and Dirt's backyard.
East Ashtabula
Neighborhood Actually Relic of Another Time
This week Martinis goes undercover to bring viewers the historical district of East Ashtabula. Full of culture and seasoned with bullshit, the famous region is certainly no secret to older city residents. Now, for the first time anywhere in cyberspace Martinis brings SweetTown into the 21st century with a list of nicknames from the community Ange says "made this town." Found in a secret laboratory beneath a manhole on Commercial Place, the list was apparently compiled by some East Ashtabulans who fled the scene back in the late 50s. "They're missin some names from Nanny Goat Hill," said Ange, "They used to call me 'Fire-in-the-Ass' Nort because I could torch a fart like you wouldn't believe." To be sure, the little area between Harbor Avenue and Columbus Street is too rich with memories -- and bullshitters -- for many to forget. But just in case it isn't, somebody tell Balish we're bringin back the fireworks during the Procession on Harbor Avenue this year.
1. Star Field
2. The Clay Tennis Courts
3. The Putting Green
4. The Mail Pouch Building
5. The Dry Crick
6. Brownie's Gas Station
7. Pacific Street School
8. Snuff-Top Baseball
9. Candela's Store on the Corner
10. The St. Angelo Outdoor Oven

Old Scoop
Want to find any story we've run since 1997? Get caught up with last week's headlines right here or search month by month in the Complete Scoop Archive.

Mystery Question Answer:  The Ragos

MARTINIS: Contact Us | Guestbook | Complain about this Site
Copyright ©2000. Martini Enterprises, Inc. All rights reserved. Martini's Down Under and Martini's at the Pavilion are registered trademarks of Martini. Any reproduction, refabrication, or reduction of the content of MARTINIS is prohibited and may cause hemorrhoids, chronic fatigue, asthma, and broken arms.