Have a drink.
Jay Vegas   Dancing AL   Joneses   Guestbook   Turkey  10 December 2000 
Search for on
You wanna bet a thousand?
mystery pic

Who the hell is this?



What was Uncle Guy's favorite pet?
Web Links
Ashtabula Property Lookup

Saturday Night Live Real Media

Ashtabula NUDE!

Caddyshack Homepage

Ashtabula Hairstyles

Ohio Criminal Lookup

Savarise Music

Soundclips AL|Anna|Anna2
Ange|Ange2|
Ange3|
BigBill
|Bob-O|Bobby
Cindy
|Dave|JoeSaint|
Loretta|Reeve|Tony-O
Get the scoop.
New Scoop

HE DID IT!!
Mark Amazes Neighborhood
Ladies and gentlemen, Martinis is proud to give you the irrefutable, unassailable, and absolutely intolerable author Mark Pucci. Check out his latest work at Barnes & Noble.com.

Sour Puss
Ann Tanna Painfully Gives Pucci Approval
Harbor Avenue scoop chairman Ann Tanna reluctantly gave Mark her stamp of approval this week, but said no one will ever convince her that the kid who yanked her flowers out is anything but a vagrant.

Easy Street
Pucci Moves to New Address
Author Mark Pucci officially moved himself to a new location Thursday. His new sanctioned street address is now: 1200 Easy Street, Penthouse Number Four, Palm Beach Intercoastal. The writer says his new pad is "all expenses paid" complete with a fully stocked bar, ballroom, Comedy Central, and all the cigarettes money can buy. Unconfirmed reports show Mark's first guest will be none other than PAT, who has claimed the mansion for a wild three months of exaggerated party throwing. "I always knew I'd see the day when I'd never have to work again," said Mark. Fans interested in Mark's new novel are invited to search under "Pucci" at all the major internet bookstores including Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million.
Fourthstivus
Spence to Sell Cars at Christmas Party
After a disastrous blizzard of a year ago, the fourth annual Festivus fruit festival will be making a comeback in December. This years ball will be held once again at Chuck's Bar and Grill with scheduled side trips down the Harbor and to the Bird. Attractions added to the party this year include Bonnie and Chuck coming out of a cake, Scott and Karen in their undershorts, and Rich's dog, Rocco. Also available at this year's fest will be a full line of Mazda cars and trucks parked on Chuck's lawn. Scott says he's got Protégés from nine thousand, as well as Duggie Savarise signature 929s fully loaded with champagne, Pink Floyd, and speedometers that start at 85mph.
Nine to Nine
Merry Mixer to Go All Nite
Just under two weeks and counting to Martini's christmas cocktail social. Although it is not known what exactly is in store for the party goers, Down Under spokesman Guy Bush has made clear that the affair will be an all-or-nothing, shoot-it celebration that will last unbelievably from 9pm to 9am. Out-of-towners wishing to reserve sleeping space on the Mark Pucci commemorative couch are advised to make arrangements with Martini before the 21st. In an interview at Parason's Restaurant, RJ Valentic said he and Jillian are in it for the long haul and have commissioned Jennifer St. Angelo to make a batch of holiday tarts. Duggie, when asked for comment, said there will be NO BROWNIES at this thing because of what happened at the picnic.

Old Scoop
Want to find any story we've run since 1997? Get caught up with last week's headlines right here or search month by month in the Complete Scoop Archive.

Mystery Question Answer:  That Goat

MARTINIS: Contact Us | Guestbook | Complain about this Site
Copyright ©2000. Martini Enterprises, Inc. All rights reserved. Martini's Down Under and Martini's at the Pavilion are registered trademarks of Martini. Any reproduction, refabrication, or reduction of the content of MARTINIS is prohibited and may cause hemorrhoids, chronic fatigue, asthma, and broken arms.