JUST RELAX NOW!





Are you too interested in Harbor Avenue? Do you wanna know more about why Ange loves his Shandy so much? Well, your search is over. Welcome to Martini's, the greater Harbor Avenue area's official homepage!

We love Martini!

Lanes' Characters
Do you know them all?
  • Marty Smith
  • Sandy Campagna
  • Jim Sardella
  • Drew Manyo
  • Benny Foo
  • Curley Warren

Just relax now, like Dave says, and Martini'll buy you a drink. We got squids, PAT, and a lotttta bullshit!
Nice toupe CHUCK!
New Scoop
Brad's Era - Lanes' pro really John Travolta: 70's disco star Brad O received a "big boobs" birthday cake this week as he turned 37. The cake, which was delivered special to The Lanes, featured two huge flesh colored boobs with hard candied nipples. All dappered up in his bell-bottoms and tight paisley vest, Brad killed all the alley lights, switched on the disco balls, and got down to some of his favorite 70's disco hits. When asked, Brad said there was no connection, however, between his love affair for the 70's and the disco balls he "needed" for lunar bowling. (yeah right)

Saturday Down Under - Red letter night for Martini & Billy: Billy and Martini turned down the Cove this week to christen the opening of the basement. "It got a little ridiculous at times," said Billy, "especially when Martini decided to start that movie at 3:15." Complete with fresh new music selections and good, thick conversation, Saturday evening was a big night for Martini, whose usual late-night counterpart Jay Vegas is on safari. "I like the night," says Martini, "I'm a vampire, just like Bobby!" Martini's Down Under is now open for business 11pm to 4am.

Bare with Me - Martini begs web audience: The site has been receiving some letters concerning the updating of the page, and pics, and so forth, and Martini says he needs to ask for your patience. "I know I haven't been updating every Sunday right on the money," says Martini, "but I got a lot of stuff goin and I need my audience to bare with me in this busy period." School together with new company Microvision has been taking up much of the web guru's time lately, but he promises to beef up everything very soon. "It's already in the works," says Martini, "we've got a new domain name and we'll be on all the search engines this week with a new image. Keep the mystery guesses comin!" The new easy-to-type address for Martini's is http://www.aimanagers.com/Martini and viewers may now look up the site on Alta Vista, Yahoo, Excite, Infoseek, and HotBot.

Young Sauce - Tom says he's not ready: They're busy busy in Columbus this week as everyone is preparing for the arrival of the newest member of the Savarice family, Baby Sauce. "I never thought I'd see another caterer in the family," said Sauce who got his nickname from cooking wings at the Crow's Nest, "I'm gonna teach him how to make homemade egg rolls, just like Dad." Tom's wife Kelly says she's a beach ball ready to pop November 1st, but Tom when asked if he was ready said, "Ayyyy! NO I AIN'T READY!! What the hell'd you think?!!"
Dirt & Tim Licate went to the state finals in power walking?
Jerry O had an afro all through the 70's?
They used to keep a cue stick behind the bar at The Lanes?
E.J. Savarise drove with two feet?
Mark Orlando was the head guy in the St. John Grimms street gang scandal of the early 80's?
Gary Nort was The Mass Executioner II back in the 70's under Capt. Lou Albano in the WWF?
?? Martini's Mystery Question ??
What family member was arrested 3 times by 3 different law enforcement agencies at Kent State University in 1985?

Answer: Bobby
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?? Martini's Mystery Pic ??
??????
If you think you can correctly identify THE WOMAN NEXT TO ANNA in this pic, e-mail Martini and you could win some of that turkey neck Bobby makes at The Lanes!
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