JUST RELAX NOW!





Are you too interested in Harbor Avenue? Do you wanna know more about why Ange loves his Shandy so much? Well, your search is over. Welcome to Martini's, the greater Harbor Avenue area's official homepage!

We love Martini!

Neighborhood Cars
Do you know them all?
Ange's Cordoba
Gary's Lincoln
Dave's Mark
Uncle Charlie's gray van
Dave's Rabbit
Roland's black truck

Just relax now, like Dave says, and Martini'll buy you a drink. We got squids, PAT, and a lotttta bullshit!
Nice toupe CHUCK!
SPECIAL CLASSIC EDITION
Ange vs. Sammy - Early 70's: It was the dream volleyball matchup between the Harbor Avenue toughguys and the All-Itayans as Joey & Sammy went up against Pat and Ange. After a couple of close calls overruled by Swedetown's muscle men, a pissed-off Angelo decided to do things like they do in the old country. Sammy went to spike and Ange undercut him and took his legs out. Sam then came down on top of Ange and after some big time pushing and shoving Ange flipped out nuts and really let him have it in Siciyan. Pat, wearing his traditional pinstripe gym shorts and sleeveless t-shirt which he wore to EVERY picnic, stood in disbelief as the then-buff Angelo went off on Sam. Loretta came over and put some ice on Ange's bloody lip and everyone had to go sit.

Tommy Saint vs. Gary - Late 60's ('68 or '69): Marge and Jerry Barone never saw as much action as on that day when they had a big Sunday birthday party at their house with about fifty 13-year-old kids runnin around. Gary had a ball darting around slapping and wrestling with everyone (like usual), until he got to Tom Saint. As Gary enjoyed rocking back and forth on that horse Marge had in the backyard big Tommy came for payback and just knocked the little Nort off the rocking horse. The funniest part of the incident happened when some Simorell relative, a bystander, ran over to Ange and said, "Angelo! Your son is fighting!!"

Relaxed Dave vs. Alan -
Crow loses turtle in early 70's: A friendly golf match turned into a brawl as family gamblers Dave & Alan couldn't tee off without a side bet. It was $5 a man when Alan "Fud" Guerini & Jeff O played David & The Crow out at Greg's place in Jefferson. On the last hole, thinking that he had the match won as well as his $10 side bet with Dave, Fud decided to start jeering at Savarise who was lining up the almost impossible match putt from off the green. The Crow found a turtle near the lake and put it in his golf bag while cool and totally relaxed Dave sank the unbelievable putt from way out. Driving home in Crow's gold Plymouth Fury, Ter and Jeff watched on as Fud, unable to take any more of Dave's shit about sinking the putt, slapped Dave in the back of the head. Dave then wacked Fud right in the face and Fud had nothing left to give so he resorted to Crow's turtle. Guerini launched the poor amphibian, hitting Dave smack in the back of the head and careening out the car window. "JESUS, I WANTED THAT TURTLE!" said Crow and they headed home and no one said a word.

Alan vs. Richard -
1966 or 67: After seeing Alan crowding home plate, catcher Rich-O told star pitcher Dave Sav to throw "a little chin music" just like Sam McDowell of the Indians. Fud didn't appreciate the close pitch and Rich got the brunt of the bat. In a rage, Father Sam said he was "sick of Harbor Avenue" and gathered up his "tribe" in that big blue wagon and floored it down Harbor Avenue, slamming the brakes in front of Alan's and then coming right back.
John Paulchel used to keep an eye on Gary so he wouldn't hurt Bobby?
Gary was "Austin" Nort when he played basketball and "Arnold" Nort when he played golf?
Pat Pucci was the Karch Kiraly of Harbor Avenue?
Wilbur Hackethorne wore motorcycle jackets all the time and was Swedetown's original Hell's Angel?
Ave O is really "Norma West?"
What family member(s) is very skilled in altering bank deposit slips?
Guess, You'll Be Right
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Click here to see Joe Bellomo at the Blue Oyster!!!
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If you think you can correctly identify the two hipsters in this pic, e-mail Martini and you could win a joyride with Bobby in that big Mercury he's drivin!


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